Tea at Trianon: Dinner Party Conversation

John Wilson Croker on Marie-Antoinette

"We have followed the history of Marie Antoinette with the greatest diligence and scrupulosity. We have lived in those times. We have talked with some of her friends and some of her enemies; we have read, certainly not all, but hundreds of the libels written against her; and we have, in short, examined her life with– if we may be allowed to say so of ourselves– something of the accuracy of contemporaries, the diligence of inquirers, and the impartiality of historians, all combined; and we feel it our duty to declare, in as a solemn a manner as literature admits of, our well-matured opinion that every reproach against the morals of the queen was a gross calumny– that she was, as we have said, one of the purest of human beings."

~from History of the Guillotine by John Wilson Croker, 1844

Edmund Burke on Marie-Antoinette

"It is now sixteen or seventeen years since I saw the queen of France, then dauphiness, at Versailles; and surely there never lighted on this orb, which she hardly seemed to touch, a more delightful vision. I saw her just above the horizon, decorating and cheering the elevated sphere she had just begun to move in, glittering like a morning star full of life and splendor and joy. Oh, what a revolution....Little did I dream that I should have lived to see such disasters fall upon her, in a nation of gallant men, in a nation of men of honor and of cavaliers! I thought ten thousand swords must have leaped from their scabbards, to avenge even a look which threatened her with insult. But the age of chivalry is gone; that of sophisters, economists, and calculators has succeeded...."

~Edmund Burke, October 1790

Monday, October 12, 2009

Dinner Party Conversation

Jay Remer has some advice on how to keep the conversation lively and interesting while avoiding heated arguments...and indigestion. It can be a challenge to take a firm but polite stand on certain vital issues of faith and morals, if they arise during the conversation at a formal dinner. In fact, I can hardly even imagine a meal at our house without the forbidden topics of politics or religion coming up. According to Mr. Remer:

- Keep the subject focused on the person to whom one is speaking rather than on oneself....

- Talk about virtues and avoiding faults or potential sore points is also good. The ego cloaks itself in passive aggression sometimes and can be cruel and certainly inappropriate at the table where digestion is important.

- Small talk (speaking about subjects which are often surface and don’t really “matter”) is always a fall back position and often times a good place to begin.

Julygirl said...: I know adults who said as children they dreaded sitting down to dinner because the time was used by the parents to interrogate, and/or berate their children instead of using it as a time to enjoy each others company.; October 12, 2009 at 3:04:00 PM EDT