Tea at Trianon: Ending the Mommy Wars

John Wilson Croker on Marie-Antoinette

"We have followed the history of Marie Antoinette with the greatest diligence and scrupulosity. We have lived in those times. We have talked with some of her friends and some of her enemies; we have read, certainly not all, but hundreds of the libels written against her; and we have, in short, examined her life with– if we may be allowed to say so of ourselves– something of the accuracy of contemporaries, the diligence of inquirers, and the impartiality of historians, all combined; and we feel it our duty to declare, in as a solemn a manner as literature admits of, our well-matured opinion that every reproach against the morals of the queen was a gross calumny– that she was, as we have said, one of the purest of human beings."

~from History of the Guillotine by John Wilson Croker, 1844

Edmund Burke on Marie-Antoinette

"It is now sixteen or seventeen years since I saw the queen of France, then dauphiness, at Versailles; and surely there never lighted on this orb, which she hardly seemed to touch, a more delightful vision. I saw her just above the horizon, decorating and cheering the elevated sphere she had just begun to move in, glittering like a morning star full of life and splendor and joy. Oh, what a revolution....Little did I dream that I should have lived to see such disasters fall upon her, in a nation of gallant men, in a nation of men of honor and of cavaliers! I thought ten thousand swords must have leaped from their scabbards, to avenge even a look which threatened her with insult. But the age of chivalry is gone; that of sophisters, economists, and calculators has succeeded...."

~Edmund Burke, October 1790

Thursday, November 6, 2008

Ending the Mommy Wars

How to love our fellow mothers.

Perhaps the next time we are tempted to judge another mother or the decisions she has made, we can step back and take a moment to reflect. We can remember that we don’t want our parenting to be judged and that we should give others the same courtesy. We can also remember that motherhood is hard and we don’t know what challenges the mothers we encounter are facing. We can recall that Jesus told us to love one another. We need to respect and support our fellow mothers on this difficult journey. We need to stand by each other and encourage each other, not tear each other down. Hopefully, then, the “mommy wars” could come to an end.

Staying in Balance said...: Amen! I would love it if this happened! We should love each other as Jesus loves.; November 7, 2008 at 6:32:00 AM EST
Alexandra said...: Amen as well. I have much less patience for this sort of judgment, perhaps because I'm an older mother of a toddler. There is also a failure to respect elders as well. Life experience is a great teacher. I sometimes wonder if some younger mothers are stuck in adolescence; you can sense great insecurities, and a lot of projection.; November 7, 2008 at 11:15:00 AM EST
Anonymous said...: Amen. We should always give one another the benefit of a doubt adn remember that each and every one is trying her level best to do what she thinks is right, even if we disagree.; November 7, 2008 at 1:42:00 PM EST