Tea at Trianon: Writing thank-you notes

John Wilson Croker on Marie-Antoinette

"We have followed the history of Marie Antoinette with the greatest diligence and scrupulosity. We have lived in those times. We have talked with some of her friends and some of her enemies; we have read, certainly not all, but hundreds of the libels written against her; and we have, in short, examined her life with– if we may be allowed to say so of ourselves– something of the accuracy of contemporaries, the diligence of inquirers, and the impartiality of historians, all combined; and we feel it our duty to declare, in as a solemn a manner as literature admits of, our well-matured opinion that every reproach against the morals of the queen was a gross calumny– that she was, as we have said, one of the purest of human beings."

~from History of the Guillotine by John Wilson Croker, 1844

Edmund Burke on Marie-Antoinette

"It is now sixteen or seventeen years since I saw the queen of France, then dauphiness, at Versailles; and surely there never lighted on this orb, which she hardly seemed to touch, a more delightful vision. I saw her just above the horizon, decorating and cheering the elevated sphere she had just begun to move in, glittering like a morning star full of life and splendor and joy. Oh, what a revolution....Little did I dream that I should have lived to see such disasters fall upon her, in a nation of gallant men, in a nation of men of honor and of cavaliers! I thought ten thousand swords must have leaped from their scabbards, to avenge even a look which threatened her with insult. But the age of chivalry is gone; that of sophisters, economists, and calculators has succeeded...."

~Edmund Burke, October 1790

Tuesday, January 23, 2007

Writing thank-you notes

Here is an article from the Ladies' Home Journal about the importance of early training in writing thank-you notes. There is nothing like sending someone a handwritten note, but an email "thank-you" is better than no "thank-you" at all. One of these days I am going to rant about the importance of giving an RSVP and how rude it is not to respond to an invitation, or to respond belatedly. (That rant may coincide with the one about the lack of graciousness of some Catholic bloggers. Knowing the catechism by heart is no replacement for basic social skills; faith is empty without works.)

http://ww4.lhj.com/lhj/story.jhtml?storyid=/templatedata/bhg/story/data/10831.xml&categoryid=/templatedata/lhj/category/data/GoodManners.xml Share

4 comments:

Anonymous said...: Dear Elena Maria -- I have a question about thank-you notes (and I apologize if the article addresses it; I haven't time to read it at the moment). I recall reading a while ago that, if you are able to thank the individual giving you a gift in person (for example, at a bridal shower, where everybody watches the gifts being opened), a thank-you note is unnecessary. Is this true? Many thanks!; January 23, 2007 at 8:07:00 PM EST
elena maria vidal said...: Hi, Lylia! Great question. I was always told that if you are able to give thanks in person, it suffices, although a little note always adds an extra touch of gratitude. I think for bridal and baby showers it is good to write notes since with so many people around it is sometimes difficult to thank everyone as they deserve. In a note one can add a special comment about the gift and about the kindness of the giver, etc.; January 23, 2007 at 8:54:00 PM EST
Anonymous said...: I agree that writing a note is what I would want to do, even if I could thank the giver in person. Thanks for your advice! Now I know that brow-beating my girls into writing those notes IS what etiquette requires!; January 23, 2007 at 10:14:00 PM EST
Anonymous said...: You are so right. From my observations of human nature I see that in our society today people think that personal power comes from being rude and crude and that the formality of being polite is seen as false. It started with the
baby boomers and their ranting and raving against the establishment, now they are reaping the whirlwind.; January 24, 2007 at 8:13:00 AM EST