I'm glad that women can now, mostly, do as they please sexually, without (too much) cultural opprobrium; we should have the option of acting like men. But casual sex has come to seem more of a necessity or an expectation. Young women – and older ones, too – feel significant pressure, from their peers and a culture in which girls who go wild are minor celebrities and Samantha Jones is cast as a role model, to have rollicking sex lives. If they want to wait to have sex, they wonder if something's wrong with them: that they're too prudish or serious or boring, or that they'll be left behind by the men they're dating.
But wasn't feminism supposed to be about choices? And giving women control over their lives? Ironically, contemporary women – with our expensive degrees and good jobs – are more valuable, in a literal sense, than we ever have been before; yet, we've lowered our value in the sexual marketplace. Regnerus points out that young women are competing with each other for men's attention and, in doing so, have lowered the metaphorical "cost" men have to pay to be with them. "When that happens, what men (even substandard men) want – access to sex with few strings – will win out," says Regnerus.
But what if women stopped settling for less? What if we felt assured it was fine to wait until we knew we wouldn't feel used? Till we felt confident that we'd enjoy the sex, and whatever might come after it? We wouldn't have utopia. But women would likely feel more empowered than we do now. Perhaps we'd also begin to feel happier. (Women's overall level of happiness has declined steadily since the early 70s, both relative to men and to women of past generations.)
More sad commentary HERE, on how American women lost their femininity. (Via The New Beginning.) Share