Wednesday, January 23, 2013

The End of Courtship?

I don't know who is more confused: the person writing the article or the people whom the article is about. I see nothing wrong with a group of young people going out together. What is sad is that young men feel they don't have to exert any effort to win a young lady's affection. This does not mean a boy has to buy jewelry for a girl. According to tradition, a lady should not accept gifts of jewelry from a man until they are engaged. What it does mean is that a gentleman who wishes to court a lady should have good grooming, good manners, and the ability to pay for the dinner or entertainment. If a man cannot pay for small diversions when enjoying the company of a young lady then he is not ready for serious courtship, which might lead to the greater responsibilities and expenses of marriage. In that case, it is better to go out with a group of friends.

 Ladies, you need to have respect for yourselves. You need to see that if a man wishes to keep company with you, he has to deserve your regard. And when keeping company with a young man, please do not think you owe him anything other than a pleasant manner. Your kisses are not for sale; your body is not for sale. Do not settle for less than the best and do not compromise your values for any reason. It seems that now boys expect girls to "hook up" with them just because they're male and breathing. From the New York Times:
Traditional courtship — picking up the telephone and asking someone on a date — required courage, strategic planning and a considerable investment of ego (by telephone, rejection stings). Not so with texting, e-mail, Twitter or other forms of “asynchronous communication,” as techies call it. In the context of dating, it removes much of the need for charm; it’s more like dropping a line in the water and hoping for a nibble.
“I’ve seen men put more effort into finding a movie to watch on Netflix Instant than composing a coherent message to ask a woman out,” said Anna Goldfarb, 34, an author and blogger in Moorestown, N.J. A typical, annoying query is the last-minute: “Is anything fun going on tonight?” More annoying still are the men who simply ping, “Hey” or “ ’sup.” (Read entire article.)


Elizabeth said...

Excellent, Elena! How sad that article in the NYT was, and I only read a few of the commenters after the article to get totally depressed. Poor people.

julygirl said...

The Woman's Movement did nothing to inform and encourage young women to regard themselves and their bodies as sacred and not as a marketable commodity.